Mourning Before Death?

I found the poem "Elegy for my Father, Who is Not Dead" to be touching and slightly grotesque. I think everyone can understand the pain the narrator is going through because of the fear he has in regards to finding out his father is dead. This subject is very identifiable because I think that all people do have the fear of picking up the phone and hearing that a loved one has died. I also could understand that his father was ready for death, but the narrator is not. Older people are ready to pass on to the next world because of their deeply rooted faith and peace with themselves. Their successors, however, cannot accept the passing of someone they love so much and greatly look up to. I know I can personally identify with this poem because of my granddad's passing this summer; my entire family knew he was more than ready, but we still had a very difficult time accepting it. The speaker is simply looking into the future and openly discussing his or her fears.